The bond of love ties a family together.
Well, in a few hours my daughter Jenna, will be on a plane flying back to California. When will I see her again, I really don’t know. I can not imagine a Christmas without her but, I don’t want every Christmas to end with the gloom of saying goodbye. Sometimes it’s hard being a mother. For twenty years my whole life rotated around my children. Then suddenly, they are all grown up and making a life of their own. One even moves to the other side of the country, how do you deal with that? You want your child to be happy; to grown and the only way to do that is to let go. Even if it is breaking your heart. You don’t want them to feel guilty for leaving you but, now there is a emptiness. Everytime something good happens it ends with, “Gosh, I wish Jenna was here” or “My mom would have loved this”. You wait for her calls but, it’s just not the same. The only way to share your excitement is through pictures on your blog or video’s on You-Tube. When she is sad or hurting the only comfort you can give is the sound of your voice when all you really want to do is give her a hug. Modern technology is great, the telephone and web-cam are “the next thing to being there” but, the reality is, you just want to be there. Out of sight out of mind, the farther away she is the less I will see her, until one day she is just a figure in the background; that family member we “don’t see very often”. At some time or another we all face that question of moving away. Maybe it’s a job or great opportunity. I would love milder winters and more room for my horses but, I keep coming back to the same thing. Just as being a mother was important to me, so is being a grandmother. I didn’t have grandparents in my life. I want to see their first ballgames and schoolplays. To teach them to ride and care for a horse and do simple things like picking tomatoes from the garden and playing Go Fish. The family tie is like the bow we tie our shoes with. The loop is the members that leave and come back, the string,the ones that want the connection of family without the committment and in the center is that tight little knot, the mother and father that hold the family together, no matter what. In the end we only want one thing, to love our children and to be a part of their life and we will do that in what ever manner we have to. Yes, sometimes it’s hard to be a mother, but it’s the most important thing I will ever be. Of all things great and small, a mother’s love is best of all “Unknown”.
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